


heartbreaks aren't forever

by iwaizumishousewife



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Break Up, Falling In Love, M/M, POV Sugawara Koushi, Past Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru, Past Relationship(s), Past Sawamura Daichi/Sugawara Koushi, Post-Break Up, Rare Pairings, Sad Oikawa Tooru, Sugawara Koushi-centric, i'm sorry daichi isn't that likable here, suga just wants to be loved
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-19
Updated: 2021-01-26
Packaged: 2021-03-18 03:27:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,010
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28860285
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iwaizumishousewife/pseuds/iwaizumishousewife
Summary: Suga is suffering from heartbreak after his longtime boyfriend breaks up with him for ambiguous reasons in the middle of the season. Can he find comfort in someone unexpected?
Relationships: Oikawa Tooru/Sugawara Koushi, Sawamura Daichi/Sugawara Koushi, former DaiSuga
Comments: 13
Kudos: 61





	1. you hurt me, and i'm not sure how to recover

**Author's Note:**

> i'm back with another rare pair fic lol. i like writing these more than the more popular pairs bc somebody needs to write them! i'm bad at writing angst and in general so pls bear with me. enjoy!!

_I just think we’re growing apart._

Suga splashes water on his face to wake himself up from this horrific dream he’s trapped in. 

_We’re going to graduate soon._

He stares at his reflection, wondering what the hell is so wrong with him that his boyfriend-no, his _ex_ -broke his heart into a million pieces, leaving Suga to pick up the pieces. It was only five minutes ago, and Suga had run to hide in the bathroom, away from Daichi and their severed relationship. 

He sighs and leans back, loosening his grip on the bathroom sink. The others are probably wondering where he is. Unless Daichi had given them an excuse, or even worse, told them the truth. He was going to have to face everyone eventually, but his heart is freshly broken, so they can wait. Everything can wait. 

He’s not sure why Daichi picked a week before their next game to break the news to him. Not that waiting is any better, but Suga’s not sure how he can play with someone who just broke up with them. Shit, how is practice going to go? Can he keep up the facade of the caring, light-hearted Suga everyone expects him to be? 

A knock startles him from his thoughts. 

“Sugawara…” It’s Kiyoko. 

“I’m fine!” Comes his strangled reply. He curses. She can probably see right through him. 

“Just come out and talk to me, please?” 

He opens the door hesitantly, met face to face with Kiyoko Shimizu. She gives him a look, and he crumbles. 

“Kiyoko, he broke...u-up with me…” He sniffles, wiping his eyes. She pulls him into a hug silently. 

“I think you should skip practice today, Kou,” She firmly pats his back. 

“No, I have to show him I’m fine,” He cries stubbornly. Kiyoko pulls him back to look him in the eyes. 

“You are a mess, no offense, Kou. You need some time from him. Just go home, and I’ll give them an excuse. Just promise me you’ll try to not get too down on yourself, OK?” Kiyoko hugs him again and hands him his bag. 

“Here, I brought this so you could escape. Good thing classes are out for the day, right?” 

“You’re a lifesaver, Shimizu,” He breathes, taking his bag. 

“Yeah, yeah, just get out of here. Love you, Kou,” She waves, walking off. 

☆☆☆ 

Suga escapes to his house without much difficulty. Tears threaten to run down his face the whole way home, but he manages to keep his emotions in check. Luckily, his parents aren’t home, so he’s able to go straight to his bedroom and mope away. 

Almost three years down the drain, huh? All of their love ruined by about two simple phrases. There was probably going to be more, if he had stuck around. Good thing he hadn’t. It probably would have broken him, even more so than he is now. God, were they doing so poorly that he had failed to recognize the signs? 

Suga’s sure there’s more to it, but he doesn’t want to make assumptions on baseless thoughts. His heart feels like it’s been broken into a million pieces, just like every main character in a teen drama. If they could escape each other, Suga would be able to manage. But they go to the same school, play on the same volleyball team...It’s going to be a long rest of his third year at Karasuno. And here he’d thought it would be filled with loving gazes across the court, celebration kisses, etc. Now it’s nothing. Just a dark void of unknowingness, making his anxiety creep into his mind. 

He lays in the darkness of his room, crying silently as he revels in the fact that he’s single for the first time in three years. 

☆☆☆ 

  
Suga has lived three days post-Daichi. He thought returning to normal would be earth-shattering, but in reality, it’s just super awkward. They avoid each other, but when Daichi tries to speak to him, Suga just flat out ignores him. It’s worked for most of the week, and since he’s not a starter it’s not _too_ noticeable, though everyone already knows the drama. It’s created a dynamic of everyone trying to keep them away from each other, despite Suga just wanting it to go back to normal, or as normal as it can be. 

He changes fast, ready to escape before anyone can stop him from the solace of not having to see his ex. Honestly, he’s pissed that Daichi has ruined volleyball for him. It used to be fun, but now it’s something that drags them together, like a vicious whirlpool of sadness. 

He opts to walk home by himself, listening to break-up songs on his phone, ignoring the ever-present sound of his heart trying to convince him to beg for Sawamura to take him back. 

  
☆☆☆ 

Suga goes on a spur of the moment mid-afternoon jog on Saturday. He tries to channel all his anger and sadness into running, his head spinning as he tries not to think about the break-up. It’s unfortunately always on his mind, which has given him this “super sad aura”, as Hinata phrases it. It’s not like he wanted to end up like this. If anything, he wants to erase all his memories that have anything to do with his stupid ex. 

All this thinking distracts him from paying attention to where he’s going. He doesn’t recognize where exactly he’s at, but he’s sure he’s in the next town over. He’s certain of it when he walks by the Aoba Johsai gym. 

Shit, he must have run far. 

Suga turns to walk back towards his house when he hears someone opening the door, walking out. 

It’s Oikawa Tooru, looking sweaty and worn down. They make eye contact with each other awkwardly. 

“Mr. Refreshing!” Oikawa chirps, his tone not matching the almost predatory look in his eyes. 

“Um, hey. Sorry, I was just...passing through,” He says, looking at anything but Oikawa. He’s sure the other boy is going to leave him alone, but it’s not the case. 

“No, it’s fine! I was just leaving practice...Well, solo practice. By myself.” Oikawa walks down the steps leisurely, looking as confident as usual. His light brown hair is sticking to his forehead, and there are tiny beads of sweat running down the sides of his face. He pauses his steps in front of Suga, running his fingers through his hair and pushing it back. 

_God he’s attractive._

Suga curses to himself to stop ogling Oikawa. That boy is probably nothing but trouble, as far as Suga is concerned. He pushes all his traitorous thoughts down. 

“So, what’s got you looking so depressed?” Oikawa quirks an eyebrow at him, his eyes searching Suga’s face with calculation. It reminds him of the same face Oikawa makes from across the court, about to hit a jump serve that’s deadly. 

“It’s nothing I’m going to disclose to you,” Suga says, frowning. He’s sure that the other boy would find a way to use it against them at their next match. 

“C’mon, I’ll be your neutral third-party, and I’ll promise to keep my lips sealed.” He winks at Suga and smiles. 

Suga groans, because he knows he’s going to disclose his failed romantic life, mostly because he has nobody to vent to. And Oikawa isn’t involved, so he won’t be biased. 

“If I tell you, you better swear on your life not to speak of this to anyone,” He threatens. 

“I promise, now spill, Refreshing-kun.” Oikawa looks at him expectantly. 

They end up walking to some park nearby, Suga spilling everything that’s happened in the last week. Oikawa listens quietly, nodding as Suga explains his heartbreak. 

“There has to be something going on behind the scenes,” Oikawa says thoughtfully, after Suga finishes talking. 

“I’m sure there is, but I wish he would just tell me.” 

“Well, you did run away from him,” Oikawa quips. Suga glares at him. 

“Whatever. I’m not taking him back, even if he gets down and begs. I’m just frustrated that it had to happen in the middle of the season,” Suga complains. 

“I feel you. Can I tell you something?” Oikawa looks nervous, and it’s probably the first time Suga’s seen him like this. He nods. 

“I kind of...had a bad break up recently. With Iwaizumi,” Oikawa tugs at his shirt anxiously. “We’re both planning on going out of the country for different reasons, and he said he couldn’t handle it. And I couldn’t bear to just drag it out until graduation, so we’re...done for good, I guess.” 

Oikawa looks vulnerable, staring down at his hands. They both don’t say anything for a while, standing on the grass under a tree that has just started to bloom. Suga wonders where they can go from here. 

You can only go up from rock bottom, right? 

He places his hand on Oikawa’s shoulder, looking at the other boy with what hopefully is a comforting gaze. Oikawa looks back at him, his eyes looking glassy. 

“Is it stupid that I want to kiss you?” Oikawa asks softly. 

Instead of answering, Suga gives Oikawa the gentlest kiss he can manage, their lips lingering on each other’s. They pull away, staring at each other. 

“This might be a bad idea...” Suga notes, despite the fact that he's the one that initiated.

“We’re both heartbroken, right? So, this is just us comforting each other,” Oikawa says firmly, making their lips meet again. Oikawa’s lips are soft, and he pushes against Suga passionately, his hand coming to cup his face. They stay like that for another moment before Suga realizes that they’re in public. 

“Let’s meet again, yeah?” Oikawa tilts his head down, pushing his forehead against Suga’s. Suga nods against him, despite the warnings sounding off in his head. 

They exchange numbers, and Suga turns to walk away. 

Oikawa grabs his jacket and pulls him in for one more heated kiss. 

“One for the road!” He winks and runs off, waving goodbye. 

Suga is left standing in a park, wondering how the hell he got to this moment. 

  



	2. romance is a coping mechanism

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this is literally just romantic fluff, sorry :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for commenting on my last chapter! it really fuels me to write more. i know this a short chapter, but i promise to update soon!

“Comforting each other”  turns into a not-so one time idea.  Suga finds himself in Oikawa’s bed on the weekend, spooning the other boy as daylight slowly fades from the room. He nuzzles his face into the  nape of Oikawa’s neck, letting his hair tickle his face. 

They haven’t really done anything beyond making out, but Suga is sure it’s going to eventually b leed into hook-ups. It’s not like he’s new at the act itself, but Oikawa has the  face of a heartbreaker, and he’s not sure it’s something he can indulge himself in just once. Oikawa is like a planet, with  Suga orbiting around him, trying to pull himself out of the gravitational pull. He’s hurtling towards Oikawa’s surface, sure that it’s going to end in a crash. 

He pulls himself out of his negative thoughts and tightens his hold on Oikawa, who  is snoring softly,  despite the fact that he claims he doesn’t. 

_ Enjoy the moment,  _ he whispers to himself. 

☆☆☆

Suga hasn’t breathed a word of his secret affairs to any of his teammates or friends. It’s not like  it’s life ending for anyone to find out, but immediat ely starting to see someone after a breakup doesn’t look the best.  And it’s Oikawa. Which might cause some rifts between him and his friends. 

He feels lighter every day he walks to practice and in the school halls. Nobody dares to comment, but he knows that they’re all thinking it.  He even acknowledges that Daichi exists, although anything beyond small talk he refuses to do. The hurt is still there, threatening to make his chest burst.  But now it’s bearable, at least, with Oikawa to kiss it better. 

He skips to his next class, ignoring the weird looks he’s getting from the other third years.

☆☆☆

Oikawa leans in, brushing his lips against Suga’s jawline. Suga  retaliates by tugging on Oikawa’s hair, pulling him down, their noses touching. Suga stares into Oikawa’s eyes, seeing  his reflection as Oikawa stares back. They stay like this until Oikawa  presse s their heads together affectionately,  scrunching his eyes shut.

They usually  hang out on weekends after practice, doing everything and nothing at the same time.  Currently they’re standing in the back of a  7-Eleven,  ignoring the world around them. Oikawa slips his hand in Suga ’s back pocket, smiling at him with a devious grin.  Suga huffs and grabs  his hand, pulling him towards the milk bread, shaking his head as Oikawa laughs.

It’s like a stupid romance cliché, watching Oikawa as the neon lights flicker overhead and wash his hair in iridescent colors. The other boy pulls him along down the aisles. Suga squeezes his hand, and Oikawa squeezes back. 

They end up laying in Oikawa’s backyard later,  Oikawa feeding him pieces of his milk bread. Suga leans over and presses his cheek against Oikawa’s chest , listening his heartbeat. 

“Suga.”

“Hmm?” Suga replies quietly.

“What are we?” 

Suga immediately sits up, lookin g down as Oikawa looks up at him.  He’s been dreading this moment since the first moment they kissed.  _ Putting labels on things isn’t exactly easy _ , Suga thinks.

“Well...,” He starts. “ What do you want?”

Oikawa looks down at  his hand, fiddling with his zipper.

He sits up, leaning over to intertwine his fingers with Suga’s.

“I want to be with you...even if it’s not serious,” Oikawa  snuggles into his side, hiding his face.

“I’m not sure if I can handle serious right now, Oikawa. But if you want to...keep doing this,” He gestures with his hands at the two of them, “I want to . I just want to be with you,” He confesses. 

Oikawa meets his eyes,  his eyelashes fluttering as he looks up at Suga from his slouched position. He scrunches up his nose ,  pursing his lips. 

“Not many people don’t want to be exclusive with me, Mr. Refreshing,” He quips .

Suga laughs silently.

“I can’t believe that many people actually want to put up with you all the time.”

“Hey, take it back!”

Suga ends up holding Oikawa in his arms as they look at the stars, listening to him point out the different constellations. 

He thinks  for a second that this could last forever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for reading!! pls leave a comment and tell me what you think and maybe what you want to happen?? or if you have any criticisms!! I promise to update soon!!
> 
> follow me on Tumblr under the same username, we can be mutuals!!


	3. don't be jealous, be mine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> not gonna ruin anything but i finally finished this chapter!  
> some romance, some possessiveness, and some exes ;)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you to the people that commented on my last chapter! the last one was short and i felt really bad so this one is a bit longer. i had to go back and watch some episodes to remember what happened lol. hope u enjoy!

To say Suga is nervous is an understatement. Their match this week is against Seijoh, for a chance to play at the national level. He’s less nervous about the volleyball match and more about seeing his...his something. Boyfriend isn’t the right word, but just saying that they’re friends isn’t right either. It’s somewhere in between, which Suga can be thankful for, because it doesn’t require the obligations that a relationship does. Suga doesn’t have to send Oikawa morning texts, or tell fangirls to back off, or even tell his friends that he’s exclusive. Because they’re not. 

It’s like a weird grey area of romance, where rules don’t exist but fondness and passion do. Suga now knows that Oikawa likes to be held and to be comforted, and that he likes to hear affirmation, whether it’s if Suga wants to be around him or if he looks good in an outfit. Suga doesn’t mind giving him compliments, because he’s not lying when he says Oikawa is beautiful, so beautiful it’s unfair. Suga doesn’t mind holding his hand, rubbing circles on Oikawa’s palm as they walk hand in hand. 

Overall, he’s worried because they haven’t set boundaries and he’s not sure if he’s supposed to act like Oikawa is a stranger or not. They joke about showing each other off to their exes. Petty is more Oikawa’s thing, but Suga feels like he’s justified to make Daichi squirm a little bit. 

Funny enough, Daichi beats him to it. At the end of practice on Thursday, he overhears Daichi telling Asahi that he’s going out with someone tonight, and that he “finally got the courage to ask her out”. 

It makes Suga see red. Finally? Has Daichi been wanting to ask her out before they broke up? Is this mystery girl the reason that they broke up? 

He gets out of there as fast as possible, not bothering to say goodbye to anyone like he usually does. He hears Hinata calling out but he’s practically running from the gym. 

Suga ends up at the Aoba Johsai gym. He texts Tooru and waits on the steps, his chest heaving as he pulls his knees to his chest. Suga wants to cry, because he thought he was over this, but the desperation and sadness threaten to make his chest burst, just like when Daichi broke his heart the first time. Tears form in the corner of his eyes. There’s no shame in crying, but Daichi doesn’t deserve his tears. 

“Koushi!” Tooru exclaims, opening the door. Suga had only texted him that he was waiting for him to get out, because he didn’t want to tell him the real reason. 

He raises his head to look at Oikawa, whose smile falls when he sees the pained look in his eyes. 

“Kou, what’s wrong?” Oikawa sets his bag down and wraps his arms around Suga, tucking his chin on Suga’s shoulder. He rubs soothing circles on Suga’s arms, waiting for him to talk. 

“I’m...I’m frustrated, I guess,” He chokes out. “I thought I was...that I was over him, but I heard him talking about someone else and it upset me so much,” He cries, clinging to Tooru. 

Oikawa is weirdly silent, and when Suga looks up, he has what can only be described as an intensely scary look on his face as he holds Suga. 

“Tooru?” He prompts. 

“Sorry,” Oikawa shakes his head, and leans down, leaving a bruising kiss on Suga’s lips. He pulls Suga closer, his cheek pressed against the top of Suga’s head. 

“I won’t let him hurt you anymore,” Tooru murmurs after a beat of silence. “You’re mine, and he doesn’t matter, because he broke your heart. I won’t ever do that to you, I promise.” 

Suga sucks in a breath. Tooru sounds so possessive, but weirdly enough, Suga likes it. He grabs Tooru’s hands and clasps them to his chest, pressing a kiss to their joined hands. 

“Is that a love declaration?” He asks timidly. 

“What else would it be?” Oikawa looks down at their joined hands. “I want you to be mine, and I want you to forget about Captain-kun. And I don’t want you to love anybody else. I sound possessive, I know, but I like you. A lot.” Oikawa looks back up at him, once again with that vulnerable look in his eyes as he had before when they first kissed. 

“Be my boyfriend?” 

“Yes,” Suga breathes, and it feels like nothing can ruin this moment. 

Except Suga isn’t always that lucky. 

They both fail to hear Iwaizumi walking up behind them. 

“Hey, Oikawa, I locked up the clubroom...” Iwaizumi trails off, looking at the two of them huddled together, their hands clasped. He just stares at them, until Oikawa decides to speak up. 

“Um, Iwa-chan, this is Sugawara Koushi. My boyfriend,” Oikawa manages to utter out, looking somewhere between terrified and embarrassed. He stands up and sticks his hand to pull Suga up. 

Iwaizumi looks back and forth between the two of them, like he’s looking at an equation he just can’t solve. They all stand there awkwardly, letting the silence grow thick with tension. 

“Um, congrats, I guess.” Iwaizumi gives them one last look, mainly at Suga, and walks off to wherever he’s going. Oikawa watches him leave silently, his face unreadable. 

Suga feels a flare of something ugly rear up as he watches Oikawa watch his ex walk off. He grabs Oikawa’s hand, pulling him close. 

“You’re mine. He doesn’t matter anymore.” Suga kisses Oikawa’s cheek, and he nods, wrapping his arms around Suga. 

They stay like that for a while. 

☆☆☆ 

Suga warms up, trying to keep his eyes from straying over to the other side of the court. It’s weird, getting ready to play against your boyfriend and not playing with him, like he’s used to. It’d different, but he doesn’t hate it. If anything, it fuels this fire inside him to kick his boyfriend’s ass and then kiss it better later. In the volleyball match, of course. Besides, Tooru may be petty but he knows this is just as important to him as it is to Suga, so there will be no hard feelings after the game. And a little competition in a relationship is healthy. 

Suga watches from the sidelines as Oikawa wreaks havoc on the court. He’s a sight to behold, flying through the air as he hits a jump serve with pinpoint accuracy. Suga tries not to stare, but luckily, everyone else is looking at Oikawa too, so it’s not too strange to be looking at him with such intensity. Suga burns the lines of Oikawa’s face and the sweat dripping down his brow into his memory. 

By then end of the third set they are tied in a deuce, and Suga is finally put in to serve. He can feel his blood pumping as he hits the ball with ferocity, his heart thumping loudly in his ears. He wants every set to be perfect, and he doesn’t want his teammates to get in their heads. That’s what he’s here for; To make sure that everyone isn’t freaking out and thinking about what they do. 

The match goes hit for hit, back and forth as Seijoh and Karasuno score points one after another. Suga can see the determination in his boyfriend’s eyes. They meet eyes from across the net, Oikawa looking at him with a raw, animalistic look on his face. It makes Suga shiver with excitement, fear, and a hint of arousal. 

He puts the ball in the palm in his hand and breathes in, knowing this could be the last serve if they score. Then he hits it as hard as he can and prays that it’s not dug up. It is, and when it gets hit back over the net and right to his forehead. He dazedly watches as Hinata scores the last point with a spike right next to the line and past Oikawa. 

His entire team erupts in triumph, but Suga is left standing with a pounding head as he stares at Oikawa, who is staring at Kageyama. Kageyama finally turns around and Oikawa makes eye contact with him, his eyes looking as intense as before. Then he puts his hand to his mouth and blows him a kiss, a grimace on his face as he turns around and joins his team. 

Suga turns around too and lets himself revel in the fact that he’s one step closer to nationals. 

☆☆☆ 

“I’m coming to your match this week,” Oikawa says offhandedly as they walk around some kids drawing on the sidewalk. The plan was to meet up for dinner, and now they’re walking from Suga’s house to a curry place nearby. 

“You don’t have to, if you don’t want to...” Suga trails off awkwardly. “I know it sucks to watch your two least favorite people compete for your dream.” 

Oikawa stops walking and grabs Suga by his arm, turning him to face him. He purses his lips, studying Suga’s face for a minute before leaning down to give him a chaste kiss. 

“Of course I’ll come. Hopefully nobody sees me there, but...I want to see you beat stupid Ushiwaka.” Oikawa leans back and grabs his hand, leading him along. 

“No other reason?” Suga teases, holding on tightly. Oikawa looks back at him. 

“I guess you look pretty hot all sweaty and-” 

Suga crashes into Oikawa, who has apparently just run straight into someone walking the opposite direction. He rubs his head, already ready to apologize on their behalf when he notices who exactly they just ran into. 

“Suga? What are you too doing together?” Daichi asks, looking down at their hands. 

He swears under his breath. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for reading! i am trying to update at least twice a week but sometimes life gets in the way and the depression hits hard lol😭  
> 

**Author's Note:**

> if you have suggestions or critiques leave a comment, i usually always take them into consideration and respond!  
> i also write other rare pairs and if you have suggestions i will try to write it!  
> next on my list is oihina bc i usually write oikawa-centric fics but i branch out occasionally  
> also my tumblr is iwaizumishousewife if you want to be mutuals, and my twitter is iwaizumi4haji !!


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